19 march 2026 - going unc mode

11:25 PM on my 25th birthday. I've settled into my nightly routine: shower, get dressed, grab my laptop off the bookshelf, consult the pen, get in bed and get Online. Is this iteration of that routine a little extra special? nah, not really. That's ok. I actually prefer it this way. My relationship with my birthday is complicated. I've had a lot of bad ones. My parents and family have always worked very hard to give me the best birthday possible(and that could mean very different things at different times. i experienced shifts in financial circumstances post-2008 that were pretty vast. i think a lot of millenials, my fellow zillenials, and some of the older zoomers will feel me on that.). For some reason, though, throughout a lot of my school years, my birthday almost always meant an absolutely horrid day at school. Don't know why, just kinda always seemed to turn out that way.

With all that said, I'm not really prepared for my birthday to turn out as well as this one did. today went weirdly well. "it's quiet, too quiet" ahh birthday.

25 is a weird age. It's, I feel, the last time each individual birthday feels exciting. Like, being 22 sounded cooler than being 21 and being 23 sounder cooler than being 22. 26 sounds like it's going to be no different than 25. 30 sounds like where it's at, though. That's, I guess, the next exciting one. 30 should feel like turning 21 again. You become the youngest of your group again. A 29 year is the oldest "young adult" but to the "adults?" 30 is brand new!!!! And then you get to be the youngest middle aged person at 40 and then i feel like you get to do it again at 50 then you get to be the youngest elder at 60 like do you understand what i am saying here????? is this making sense????? I feel like at 25 we go from counting by 1 to counting by 5 then at 30 we start counting by 10s. This probably doesn't matter. I'm just saying shit, i fear.

I feel like I'm at an age now where people start trusting my judgement. Like, nobody wants to take instructions from a 24 year old but 25? That guy is seasoned, that's a vet. This guy's entering his prime years. I'll probably lower my auto insurance deductibles when my renewal is up. Insurance companies trust me not to crash now. Rental companies, too.

I also kinda reject the idea of "prime years." It's supposed to be that pocket between 25 and 30. Supposed to be your physical peak. Athletes tend to peak at 28(although we are seeing that peak happen earlier and earlier with the amount of games/events we're churning out of our youth athletes now. There's so much more mileage on their bodies by the time athletes leave college or go pro now. Don't get me started on the issues with youth sports. I'd write a fucking book.). I guess that's where it comes from. I feel like we never really peak, your life circumstances change, so does your body. I guess you can be peaking whenever your body and circumstances align. At 20 I was playing what more footy but I'm a much better footballer now at 25 than I was at 20 I body wasn't playing football as well when I was playing more football. I'm making more music than I ever have right now, though, and I am the best musician I've ever been right now. Does this make sense? I think so. I wanted to run a blog as a kid but didn't have a laptop, things didn't align. The circumstances and the body can align at any time. It all depends on what you want to be doing, I guess. 

I feel like I'm just saying shit at this point so it's probably best to stop writing.

Love you all, I can't believe you decided to take time out of your day to click a link or go to my website and read what I have to say.

That's pretty special.

With all the love in the world(as ever),

Geoff